Your Standards of Integrity are everything
One thing I’ve noticed over the years with my work and also interviewing hundreds (if not thousands) of people is how connected every aspect of life is…
If you think you can be a certain way in your relationship but then in all other aspects of life, you are operating with zero integrity, authenticity, honesty etc, then you will ultimately feel the effects of it.
Even in my own life, it took shifts and introspection in many other different areas of my life to actually help progress my marriage forward and this is not just the case with me…I can give you tons of examples of this.
We are on a quest for ‘wholeness’
In essence, our life is ultimately about the attainment of becoming ‘whole’.
This is typically why opposites attract.
Why we are pulled to personalities that represent the complete opposite of who we believe we are…
And Why the shy person is attracted to the super confident person and vice versa…
Why the unconfident person is attracted to the brash, outgoing person.
It is because the deepest part of ourselves yearn for completeness and hence, these individuals can develop in these areas that are the opposite of their core self so they can become whole.
Unfortunately though – as we all know, not many take this enlightened view of relationships and hence what normally happens is that the very trait that we were attracted to in the first place pisses us off when we have to face it day in day out.
The shy person finds it extremely frustrating that their confident partner is so loud and ‘out there’ all the time.
The confident partner gets so annoyed that the other person is unable to step into their power and make decisions etc.
Now, here’s how this relates to our standards of integrity. If we are seeking to become whole, then whenever we push something away or suppress a feeling that we naturally have, we end up using a ton of energy.
Trust me, it takes up a huge amount even if you aren’t aware of it. It can also be a bit of a silent killer…it just chips away which is the worst part of it. This is what happened to me until I recognised that I needed to do a bit of a stock take.
Part of that was also about how authentic I was. Was I operating in alignment with my values? Was I being true to myself? The Answer was no. Hence, I really needed to focus on making some major changes here.
“There’s a difference between knowing the path and walking the path”
I also encourage you all to do the same. How much are you operating with integrity?
If one of your core values is giving love, then how often do you do this?
Or are you afraid of being rejected? If you fear rejection, you will be using up a ton of energy suppressing the love inside of you.
Is one of your values integrity and being trustworthy?
Is it important to operate with truth and yet, maybe you owe some money to a friend/business etc that you’ve held yourself back from paying them back for a while?
If so, then setup an AP, write them an apology letter and do it. You will feel so much better and you will be one step closer to living a life of authenticity and wholeness.
Some of you may read this and wonder – what the hell has this got to do with my marriage or relationship? Well, it has everything to do with it.
You see, what we typically express or give out, we get back. We need to recognise this and whilst I appreciate that it’s a little more complex than just a straight cause and effect situation, it typically plays out like this in the long run.
Just some food for thought for you all.
Stay consistent with who you are. Operate with integrity and you will find more peace and joy and god/the universe will reward you for it