I was going through a Facebook Post recently and there were three underlying themes that really stood out for me in the post:
- How can you discover your passion and calling in life?
- Due to fear of attracting the wrong men, this person was pulling away from the thought of pursuing love again
- When you are doing something you love doing, then love will naturally find you
After reading this post, I was inspired to put this blog together. Why? Because so many of my clients and people online are having the exact same questions:
Discovering Your Passion
This is a pretty hot topic. We all want to do what we love. We don’t want to work – we simply just want to have fun and feel like we are making a difference every day. However, there is the small matter of making money that stands in the way. So the question is – how do we go about finding our passion and making an actual living out of it?
Well I believe there are four steps to the process:
Ask the right questions from the right emotional state
I think about all the times when things have gone well for me and it’s always been when I’ve been in a positive emotional place and have asked quality questions of myself. If we are in a negative state and then ask a question such as “Is there anything that I am good at?” in a fairly resigned manner, then it’s highly likely that you will get a negative answer. However, if you are in an upbeat positive emotional state and ask a question like “What do I love and completely lose track of time in?” and you keep asking that question from that emotional place, you will get a high quality answer.
Recognise that you can make money from it
I can’t tell you how many times I speak to people and ask them what they are passionate about and they rattle off a list of so many things that they could do but then that voice inside of them comes along and says “oh you can’t make money out of that!”. We are in an age where money can be made out of almost any activity. I know people who are absolutely smashing it online selling products in the dog care, meditation, travel, design markets (and many more). Know that there are opportunities everywhere. Don’t let your mind suddenly jump to conclusions without actually having facts to back it up. Give yourself the gift of at least exploring the market and doing some research and then let the evidence guide you on whether to immerse yourself in it or not.
Pay ZERO attention to the naysayers!
There are always going to be people out there who are going to doubt your abilities and think that you can’t make it. This is not your issue – this is theirs. They are simply projecting their own fears onto you. When I first started my coaching business, I can’t begin to tell you how many people doubted my abilities. However, there was a part of me that always knew that I could do it. Thankfully I never listened to the naysayers – nor should you!
Detach from having to discover it
I firmly believe that one of the reasons that I discovered my passion is because I was completely detached from trying to find it. In other words, I wasn’t desperate for it. I desired it, but I wasn’t desperate for it.
I vividly remember the moment it happened for me. It was 2007 – I absolutely hated what I was doing. I was in IT and working for a large corporate. Every day was a struggle to get to work and I was completely filled with fear. I knew I had to get out and I was desperate to. I then stumbled on an article that touched on the concept of detachment. This resonated with me so strongly that I knew I had to put it into practice. Fast forward 6 months – an awakening happened. I was driving in my car and out of nowhere I started to see everything clearly. I noticed how I kept attracting lots of people into my life who were wanting to offload all their problems. Initially it was annoying for me but it all made sense. This was my gift. This was my calling. From that day on, I knew it was my calling to serve and transform the lives of individuals all over the world. Now if I was completely attached to finding my purpose, I genuinely believe I would have overlooked all of this and then would have made some rash decision – or would have stayed put in the corporate world.
Detach yourself from the outcome and watch the universe unfold in ways that you could never have thought possible.
Pulling Away from Pursuing Love
Ok I totally get it. I know how painful heartbreak can be and it’s totally natural for us to completely avoid getting hurt. It’s human nature.
However, if you choose not to pursue something magical for fear of getting hurt, you are simply moving in the wrong direction. You will end up missing opportunities and be weary and fearful every time someone approaches you. Then when it’s time to take action where something exciting could happen, it’s likely you will hold back as a protective mechanism.
In life, we have to accept that if we want great things to happen, we also need to accept the possibility of the opposite happening. But that shouldn’t mean that we don’t take risks. Am I saying that you jump at any chance you get? Absolutely not – but as long as you are motivated by love – that is love for others and yourself – you will be grounded with the foundations that will ensure that you make the right decisions for your mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.
Always remember, be firmly grounded in love. Love yourself, love others – find it in your heart to even love your so-called enemies and life will then reward you in ways you could never have imagined.
Will you find love when you are doing something that you are love?
As much as I could say that when you are doing something that you love, you will attract that special someone into your life, I would be doing you a complete disservice. We can never be 100% sure exactly when and how it will happen but one thing I do know in my heart is that when we are operating from a place of love, we will attract that special someone into our life. Sometimes it may take a period of time to get to that place where we are ready for love to come into our lives, but it will happen.
In my own life, it wasn’t until I was actually able to truly develop that love for life and for myself was I able to attract my soulmate. For years, I had felt lonely – going from relationship to relationship and never feeling fulfilled.
I was getting frustrated and losing hope that I would ever attract my soulmate until I actually made a very conscious decision that I was going to stop looking for a relationship to heal the void inside of me. That didn’t mean I was going to isolate myself from the world – it just meant that my intention was to heal myself by truly loving myself. If that meant that healing myself came from relationships, dating, success and failure – then so be it, but I was never going to look for an external source to do it for me.
Slowly but surely the tide started to turn and within 18 months, I attracted the love of my life who I’m now so grateful to be married to. I genuinely believe this could never have happened if I had been motivated by fear.
Stay grounded, stay focussed, trust in the moment and find it in your heart to say yes to love. With love as your grounding, you are setting the foundations for an extraordinary life and an extraordinary relationship.